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intertribalQ: Anyone know where the title of the post comes from?
A: "Hey Man, Nice Shot" by Filter. One of my favorite songs-I-don't-own, one I tracked down after I heard it in this awesome X-Files episode starring Giovanni Ribisi as a loser-mechanic who hangs out at the arcade with Jack Black, lusts after his jock-boss's wife, and has the power to control electricity, "D.P.O" (for Direct Power Outlet). He goes about killing the jocks that teased him in high school and trying to force the lady to love him back by giving her husband heart attacks. It's one of those Carrie-style episodes, you know, revenge of the magical nerds - always amusing. I've taken to saying that Carrie is my favorite teen movie. Maybe I should just buy the song. It's definitely about a newscaster who shot himself on the air (on a snow day, so all these children were home from school watching), but well. It's a good song. And I really fucking miss the X-Files. It's never on air anymore.
Man, I love how articulate NFL players are when they talk to the media. Courtesy of Adam "Pacman" Jones:
- "That's stupid. It's so stupid I have no more comments." (this reminds me of Homer Simpson: "Because they're stupid, that's why, that's the reason everybody does everything.")
- "If I beat myself up, who will take care of me?"
- "Football means a lot to me, but it's not everything."
- "It's not like I'm taking it pretty good."
- "I love me some me."
Granted, it's not just the NFL. A lot of athletes do not have verbal media savvy (can they pose for commercials? yes. but damn, the promo line better be short, and if it's a print commercial, even better). Obviously if English is a second language, that's another issue. But Roddick, for example, has no excuse. And the athletes that can compose sentences never tell reporters anything interesting. It's always, "well, they played a great game" and "we're gonna do our best" and "we want to get this win for coach" and the rest of that stiff, rehearsed, Remember-the-Titans drivel. They always look all shifty when they say it too, like little kid actors trying to remember their lines.
Which is why I appreciate:
- "I got one on. Don't worry about it. I'm not telling you how many times it took me, but I got one on." (on a particular hole at a golf course)
- "I won't let them take any reps away from me. I'm selfish."
- "It was a bad throw and it was a mistake but I didn’t want it to hurt us down the road so I pretty much forgot about it. I was more upset I didn’t make the tackle." (on an interception returned for a touchdown - I'm telling you, in this neck of the woods, quarterbacks are expected to tackle as well as pass, run, and receive. what's next? kicking duties?)
- "I'm going to have to take those guys out to dinner tomorrow night if my dad gives me the credit card."
- "We all had to come together and make sure that the same cancerous attitude didn’t eat our football team up again."
Seriously, he uses words like "cancerous." What athlete uses words like cancerous? Unless they're describing an actual tumor?
A: "Hey Man, Nice Shot" by Filter. One of my favorite songs-I-don't-own, one I tracked down after I heard it in this awesome X-Files episode starring Giovanni Ribisi as a loser-mechanic who hangs out at the arcade with Jack Black, lusts after his jock-boss's wife, and has the power to control electricity, "D.P.O" (for Direct Power Outlet). He goes about killing the jocks that teased him in high school and trying to force the lady to love him back by giving her husband heart attacks. It's one of those Carrie-style episodes, you know, revenge of the magical nerds - always amusing. I've taken to saying that Carrie is my favorite teen movie. Maybe I should just buy the song. It's definitely about a newscaster who shot himself on the air (on a snow day, so all these children were home from school watching), but well. It's a good song. And I really fucking miss the X-Files. It's never on air anymore.
Man, I love how articulate NFL players are when they talk to the media. Courtesy of Adam "Pacman" Jones:
- "That's stupid. It's so stupid I have no more comments." (this reminds me of Homer Simpson: "Because they're stupid, that's why, that's the reason everybody does everything.")
- "If I beat myself up, who will take care of me?"
- "Football means a lot to me, but it's not everything."
- "It's not like I'm taking it pretty good."
- "I love me some me."
Granted, it's not just the NFL. A lot of athletes do not have verbal media savvy (can they pose for commercials? yes. but damn, the promo line better be short, and if it's a print commercial, even better). Obviously if English is a second language, that's another issue. But Roddick, for example, has no excuse. And the athletes that can compose sentences never tell reporters anything interesting. It's always, "well, they played a great game" and "we're gonna do our best" and "we want to get this win for coach" and the rest of that stiff, rehearsed, Remember-the-Titans drivel. They always look all shifty when they say it too, like little kid actors trying to remember their lines.
Which is why I appreciate:
- "I got one on. Don't worry about it. I'm not telling you how many times it took me, but I got one on." (on a particular hole at a golf course)
- "I won't let them take any reps away from me. I'm selfish."
- "It was a bad throw and it was a mistake but I didn’t want it to hurt us down the road so I pretty much forgot about it. I was more upset I didn’t make the tackle." (on an interception returned for a touchdown - I'm telling you, in this neck of the woods, quarterbacks are expected to tackle as well as pass, run, and receive. what's next? kicking duties?)
- "I'm going to have to take those guys out to dinner tomorrow night if my dad gives me the credit card."
- "We all had to come together and make sure that the same cancerous attitude didn’t eat our football team up again."
Seriously, he uses words like "cancerous." What athlete uses words like cancerous? Unless they're describing an actual tumor?
- Jason Mraz strikes me as a real douche. At least he does in this video. It's just like, take your whores and get out of the tropics. You're not cool. You're like millions of other consumerist assholes who think you're being unconventional and care-free. GTFO!!!!!!! Sorry, videos like that bring out the worst in me.
- Taylor Swift sucks. Her voice is wretched, even for country. "Love Story" is the most pathetic song and video I've ever had to hear. Ever. Yes, that's how bad it is: "Little did I know that you were Romeo, you were throwing pebbles, and my Daddy said, "Stay away from Juliet" and I was crying on the staircase begging you "Please don't go." You'll be the prince, I'll be the princess, it's a love story, baby just say yes." Are you kidding me? That's what passes for country lyrics these days? Crazy politics aside, country used to have pretty good lyrics. Give me "Before He Cheats" by Carrie Underwood any day: "Right now he's probably buying her some fruity little drink cuz she can't shoot whiskey, right now he's probably up behind her with a pool stick showing her how to shoot a combo... Right now she's probably up singing some white trash version of Shania karaoke... Right now he's probably dabbing on three-dollars worth of that bathroom cologne, oh and he don't know that I dug my key into the side of his pretty little souped-up four wheel drive, carved my name into his leather seat... maybe next time he'll think before he cheats."
- Taylor Swift sucks. Her voice is wretched, even for country. "Love Story" is the most pathetic song and video I've ever had to hear. Ever. Yes, that's how bad it is: "Little did I know that you were Romeo, you were throwing pebbles, and my Daddy said, "Stay away from Juliet" and I was crying on the staircase begging you "Please don't go." You'll be the prince, I'll be the princess, it's a love story, baby just say yes." Are you kidding me? That's what passes for country lyrics these days? Crazy politics aside, country used to have pretty good lyrics. Give me "Before He Cheats" by Carrie Underwood any day: "Right now he's probably buying her some fruity little drink cuz she can't shoot whiskey, right now he's probably up behind her with a pool stick showing her how to shoot a combo... Right now she's probably up singing some white trash version of Shania karaoke... Right now he's probably dabbing on three-dollars worth of that bathroom cologne, oh and he don't know that I dug my key into the side of his pretty little souped-up four wheel drive, carved my name into his leather seat... maybe next time he'll think before he cheats."
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Re: list of reactions...
Date: 2009-01-09 02:55 pm (UTC)Oh man, that whole distracting men thing... is so much bullshit. Come to think of it, it is kind of out there as a romantic ideal; never occurred to me before. It's very teen-angsty, you know. If it were me, I would be like, "get your mind on the FUCKING GAME" - and that doesn't just apply to football. I'm seriously allergic to loser slacker boys that don't work hard and at least try to be competent. Allergic. And to ones who aren't passionate enough about what they're doing with their life that they'd rather just get laid.
On a related note, Andre Agassi totally fell apart when he was married to Brooke Shields. Could not play worth a damn. Of course, he was a rebel without a cause back then, who refused to play in Wimbledon "on principle" because you have to wear white in that tournament. Then they divorced, he achieved some kind of spiritual center or something, decided to just suck it up and wear white to Wimbledon, and won the whole thing on his first try (and he was like "goddamnit all those years I boycotted Wimbledon WHY DID I DO THAT"). And when he married Steffi Graf his tennis actually got better, considering his age. I think that's how good relationships should be, the relationship helps each person's individual goals/passions. This is not to be taken as the same as marrying someone who can get you a good job or country club card or something, I mean... well, hopefully you know what I mean.
Although that sort of reminds me of my mom trying to get my dad to hang out with her instead of doing his Ph.D. work when they were dating. Apparently he was like, "no, I have to study!!!" so I don't think my mom was successful.
Because women think distracting men is the way you prove your worth or because you think those uniforms are cute?
Re: list of reactions...
Date: 2009-01-10 04:52 am (UTC)Lol. And yeah, I totally agree about healthy relationships being able to support both people as individuals.
I mean, sometimes it can be really taxing, when one partner has a really all-consuming task, and you do have to learn to balance things, but it shouldn't be a matter of 'giving up' your own life for the other person. Which is what women do all the fucking time...
Well, I meant the latter, but probably both, with different types of women under different circumstances.
Re: list of reactions...
Date: 2009-01-10 04:58 am (UTC)that's like, beyond dumb.
Re: list of reactions...
Date: 2009-01-10 05:06 am (UTC)Re: list of reactions...
Date: 2009-01-10 05:18 am (UTC)Re: list of reactions...
Date: 2009-01-10 05:52 am (UTC)Re: list of reactions...
Date: 2009-01-10 05:57 am (UTC)