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intertribalSince it's the French Open Finals this weekend, I present to you my first uncomprehensive guide to tennis champions. This one is devoted to tennis champions in love - arguably the most pathetic piece of tennis analysis possible, but you know, what can I say, I'm a girl. And no matter what anybody tells you, tennis is all about human interest stories. Future uncomprehensive guides might include traumatic family histories, "injuries," and the insanity of the French (and if I'm discussing Justine Henin, all three!). Depends on what I'll feel like.
I. Andre Agassi + Steffi Graf = ♥ ♥ ♥. My earliest tennis memory was watching Andre Agassi and Pete Sampras on tv with my mom. We were in Indonesia. I was very small. I asked my mother who she was rooting for, and she said she liked Agassi more than Sampras. Being the impressionable kid I was, I turned this one remark into lifelong support for cow-eyed Andre Agassi, and lifelong hatred for Pete Sampras and his gross lolling tongue. Just like being a Husker fan formed my fundamental opinions about football, being an Agassi fan formed my fundamental opinions about tennis - that serve and volley is more exciting than power tennis, and that a good flexible return can and will outlast any narrow-minded onslaught of aces. In my defense, Sampras grew up into a Republican married to a soap actress named Bridget, and Agassi grew up into a Democrat married to my first favorite female tennis player, Steffi Graf. For those not in the know, Steffi is undisputably one of the best female tennis players in history (and perhaps the best). When I first started watching the grand slams and rooting for these two, I - and the rest of the tennis world - had no idea they would end up together. I mean, it certainly didn't seem likely.
Andre was the wildchild of tennis, the one who refused to play in Wimbledon because he refused to wear all-white. He dated Barbra Streisand and married Brooke Shields, and while he was making tennis exciting for young audiences (including my mother), the establishment found him annoying. Steffi was the introverted princess of the court, tall and austere and very private. The most dramatic thing to happen to her was externally-imposed, when a psycho stalker of hers stabbed Monica Seles during one of their matches. Andre finally decided to wear all-white and play Wimbledon for the first time in 1992. He won the championship. On the women's side, so did Steffi. It was their first meeting - Andre had a crush on Steffi, but Steffi thought Andre was just another psycho on account of his wild-eyed look and long hair. Nothing came out of that champions' dance. Years later (1999) they both won the French Open, both coming up from behind. That time Andre was more zen, with much less hair. He'd divorced Brooke Shields, and had been making it clear to Steffi - by asking to practice with her, etc. - that he was still interested. After that champions' dance, they started dating.
They're now retired philanthropists who live in Vegas with their two adorable little blonde children, Jaden-Gil and Jaz (and a shitload of money). The whole family is basically the cutest thing ever, they get invited to present trophies at Grand Slams, and commentators want the kids to grow up so they can start destroying everyone else on the court. In other words, everybody loves them, and they love everybody. Life is good.
II. Roger Federer + Mirka Vavrinec = ♥ ♥ ♥. While not as fortuitous as Andre and Steffi, Roger and Mirka are still a power tennis couple and on account of still being on tour, are my new obsession. Federer is my favorite active player and one thing I really like about the guy is Mirka. I've recently come to the conclusion that male tennis stars either marry other tennis players (Andre) or aspiring model/actresses (Sampras). Andy Roddick, Tommy Haas, and Lleyton Hewitt (who threw away a perfectly awesome tennis player, Kim Clijsters, and therefore deserves his shitty results) followed Sampras' model. They all suck, btw. Andy Roddick in particular needs to get put out of his misery. Federer, on the other hand followed Andre's model. Mirka is no longer an active tennis player because of a nagging foot injury, but she was one of those many Eastern European little girls who Martina Navratilova gave a racket to, and she met Federer when they were both on the 2000 Swiss Olympic team. They've been together ever since - yes, 9 years, and by together I mean inseparable. This year Mirka became pregnant, and they got married in a little civil ceremony in his hometown, Basel.
Cute as a fucking button.
It's remarkable how happy Federer is when he talks about her. And no wonder - he says that Mirka has provided a calm center to his life, and has been there for him throughout his massive ups and downs. To quote someone on the internet, these two are definitely at home with each other (enough that Mirka's his manager!). You can tell how Federer is doing in a match by watching Mirka's expression - she's still there courtside at every match, even though the baby's due in September. As Federer says, "She loves tennis and she doesn't pull me away from tennis, she actually pushes me to it which is fantastic." And that is why tennis/tennis couples work better than tennis/model couples. They understand and love each other's priorities. Now if Federer can just win some tournaments, that would be great. Okay, R-Fed? 1 more match for the French! And for god's sake, don't make the missus too tense this time!
I. Andre Agassi + Steffi Graf = ♥ ♥ ♥. My earliest tennis memory was watching Andre Agassi and Pete Sampras on tv with my mom. We were in Indonesia. I was very small. I asked my mother who she was rooting for, and she said she liked Agassi more than Sampras. Being the impressionable kid I was, I turned this one remark into lifelong support for cow-eyed Andre Agassi, and lifelong hatred for Pete Sampras and his gross lolling tongue. Just like being a Husker fan formed my fundamental opinions about football, being an Agassi fan formed my fundamental opinions about tennis - that serve and volley is more exciting than power tennis, and that a good flexible return can and will outlast any narrow-minded onslaught of aces. In my defense, Sampras grew up into a Republican married to a soap actress named Bridget, and Agassi grew up into a Democrat married to my first favorite female tennis player, Steffi Graf. For those not in the know, Steffi is undisputably one of the best female tennis players in history (and perhaps the best). When I first started watching the grand slams and rooting for these two, I - and the rest of the tennis world - had no idea they would end up together. I mean, it certainly didn't seem likely.
Wimbledon, 1992 Wimbledon, 2009
They're now retired philanthropists who live in Vegas with their two adorable little blonde children, Jaden-Gil and Jaz (and a shitload of money). The whole family is basically the cutest thing ever, they get invited to present trophies at Grand Slams, and commentators want the kids to grow up so they can start destroying everyone else on the court. In other words, everybody loves them, and they love everybody. Life is good.
II. Roger Federer + Mirka Vavrinec = ♥ ♥ ♥. While not as fortuitous as Andre and Steffi, Roger and Mirka are still a power tennis couple and on account of still being on tour, are my new obsession. Federer is my favorite active player and one thing I really like about the guy is Mirka. I've recently come to the conclusion that male tennis stars either marry other tennis players (Andre) or aspiring model/actresses (Sampras). Andy Roddick, Tommy Haas, and Lleyton Hewitt (who threw away a perfectly awesome tennis player, Kim Clijsters, and therefore deserves his shitty results) followed Sampras' model. They all suck, btw. Andy Roddick in particular needs to get put out of his misery. Federer, on the other hand followed Andre's model. Mirka is no longer an active tennis player because of a nagging foot injury, but she was one of those many Eastern European little girls who Martina Navratilova gave a racket to, and she met Federer when they were both on the 2000 Swiss Olympic team. They've been together ever since - yes, 9 years, and by together I mean inseparable. This year Mirka became pregnant, and they got married in a little civil ceremony in his hometown, Basel.
Cute as a fucking button.
It's remarkable how happy Federer is when he talks about her. And no wonder - he says that Mirka has provided a calm center to his life, and has been there for him throughout his massive ups and downs. To quote someone on the internet, these two are definitely at home with each other (enough that Mirka's his manager!). You can tell how Federer is doing in a match by watching Mirka's expression - she's still there courtside at every match, even though the baby's due in September. As Federer says, "She loves tennis and she doesn't pull me away from tennis, she actually pushes me to it which is fantastic." And that is why tennis/tennis couples work better than tennis/model couples. They understand and love each other's priorities. Now if Federer can just win some tournaments, that would be great. Okay, R-Fed? 1 more match for the French! And for god's sake, don't make the missus too tense this time!
