intertribal: (is really insect eyes.)
[personal profile] intertribal
Scare Tactics, that is, with Tracy Morgan (SNL) as host (he's no Shannen Doherty, but anybody's better than that chump Stephen Baldwin)! I know, not everybody's brand of humor. Not that I revel in people's fear or anything, but it really is funny the things that people do/say when they're freaked out. I thought I'd share some of my favorite snippets. It's always nice to see who'd actually survive a zombie attack.

Little Monster Man, i.e. "We can come back with, like, some guns."


Gorilla's Fist, i.e. "You deserve to die, bro!"


You Going Somewhere, Man?, i.e. "What the fuck bro!"


Big Snake, i.e., "Stay in the light, I'm 'a stay right next to this motherfuckin' thing."


Alien Hunters, i.e., "I'm just a dancer, dude!"


Cemetery Panic, i.e., "What is it called that thing you lay in when you die, when you die?"


Runaway Corpse, i.e., "I kick you off!"


Meat Hook, i.e., "I can't do it, I'll pass out man."


Vampire Assistant, i.e., "I don't want to be a vampire, I don't want to get eaten, and that is not cool."


Indian Grave Site, i.e., "Don't even go by there, dog, what're you trippin' on, man?"


Chupacabra Attack, i.e., "Gimme somethin' to hit 'im with!"


My bets? The marks from Big Snake, Runaway Corpse, Gorilla's Fist, Indian Grave Site, and Vampire Assistant are the only ones that would survive a zombie attack. I doubt Gorilla's Fist would survive with his soul in tact, though. Kudos to Runaway Corpse dude and Chupacabra Attack dude (who would probably die) and Vampire Assistant girl (and to some extent Indian Grave Site guy) for actually trying to protect the people they're with and fighting their monsters!

However... I'm sad that I can't show you my favorite Scare Tactics episode of all time, Demon's List, where a guy thinks his boss wants him to kill innocent people who he thinks are possessed with demons - the boss asks him if he's on the side of Evil and he says with hands in the air, "No. I am Goodness," and yeah, that is some awesome life-saving impromptu, Demon's List guy.
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