I mean, arguing like this doesn't invigorate me. It doesn't make me think. If anything it makes me think less
Hm, well that's certainly not good. I'm sorry to be part of that.
it makes me stressed, and it disables me from doing my work or my writing. It makes me feel sort of ill/nauseated.
I know what you mean, but don't you see that it makes me feel that way too when you disagree with what I'm putting forward as important beliefs? I think that's what being challenged in my beliefs just feels like, for me. I think beliefs are comforting, and if you can have a totally bland, comforting, discussion, you aren't really dealing with something in a way that can change what people think. Not that you will otherwise, but it's the potential, the stress involved, the doubt.
And I think it's at least in part because you determine the things we "discuss", and they're not the things I would discuss and thereby have strong opinions on, they're sort of incidental things that I don't have any strong opinion on. And to me it all just becomes such bullshit, very fast.
Well, aside from what's important to me just being called "incidental things", what would you discuss? I mean, I know you have strong opinions on other things, but very often they are things where all I can say is, "I agree", or "That seems right," or "I'm glad you had that experience," or whatever. I really don't know what else to say. By all means, though, change the topic if you're bored with what I ramble about. Ask me questions, or demand response to something. I'll do my best.
Like just now. I'm trying to make a real point about why I have a hard time dealing with foundations of life and such - and further that I'm trying to tell you about myself and how I came to be who I am now, which I think is a very important sort of realization - and you completely skip over it.
I really didn't skip over it. I read every word, and responded, in my way. Perhaps I responded less than I could have because I didn't want to emphasize disagreement here, in this discussion. I don't think big ideas are worth blood, but I do think they're worth honesty. Why not live for them? Why want a calm, healthy life? I would choke on a calm, healthy life. I would get tired, and sleep all the time, and never be motivated. It would end up the opposite of healthy. And so I don't know what to do with your experience. I don't see why ideas should make shrapnel. I don't think we have to get "nasty over ideas", but I do think people should be able to deal with them, and maturely, and that that's a lot less likely to create real shrapnel than ignoring them and letting things lie calm. But I don't think, as I said, that that means I need to "attack" others' beliefs. But question, always question. I'm sure it's good for the Foreign Service, that makes a lot of sense, it's the essence of being diplomatic. If I were trying to be diplomatic, certainly, I would take other approaches, but I take a lot of things as part of a struggle to find the truth. As for "The Quiet American", I've seen the movie but not read the book. My dad took me because he likes Michael Caine. But I've forgotten most of it, except being disturbed by some aspect of sex/romance in the movie. So, perhaps I should read it.
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Date: 2008-10-26 06:43 am (UTC)Hm, well that's certainly not good. I'm sorry to be part of that.
it makes me stressed, and it disables me from doing my work or my writing. It makes me feel sort of ill/nauseated.
I know what you mean, but don't you see that it makes me feel that way too when you disagree with what I'm putting forward as important beliefs? I think that's what being challenged in my beliefs just feels like, for me. I think beliefs are comforting, and if you can have a totally bland, comforting, discussion, you aren't really dealing with something in a way that can change what people think. Not that you will otherwise, but it's the potential, the stress involved, the doubt.
And I think it's at least in part because you determine the things we "discuss", and they're not the things I would discuss and thereby have strong opinions on, they're sort of incidental things that I don't have any strong opinion on. And to me it all just becomes such bullshit, very fast.
Well, aside from what's important to me just being called "incidental things", what would you discuss? I mean, I know you have strong opinions on other things, but very often they are things where all I can say is, "I agree", or "That seems right," or "I'm glad you had that experience," or whatever. I really don't know what else to say. By all means, though, change the topic if you're bored with what I ramble about. Ask me questions, or demand response to something. I'll do my best.
Like just now. I'm trying to make a real point about why I have a hard time dealing with foundations of life and such - and further that I'm trying to tell you about myself and how I came to be who I am now, which I think is a very important sort of realization - and you completely skip over it.
I really didn't skip over it. I read every word, and responded, in my way. Perhaps I responded less than I could have because I didn't want to emphasize disagreement here, in this discussion. I don't think big ideas are worth blood, but I do think they're worth honesty. Why not live for them? Why want a calm, healthy life? I would choke on a calm, healthy life. I would get tired, and sleep all the time, and never be motivated. It would end up the opposite of healthy. And so I don't know what to do with your experience. I don't see why ideas should make shrapnel. I don't think we have to get "nasty over ideas", but I do think people should be able to deal with them, and maturely, and that that's a lot less likely to create real shrapnel than ignoring them and letting things lie calm. But I don't think, as I said, that that means I need to "attack" others' beliefs. But question, always question. I'm sure it's good for the Foreign Service, that makes a lot of sense, it's the essence of being diplomatic. If I were trying to be diplomatic, certainly, I would take other approaches, but I take a lot of things as part of a struggle to find the truth. As for "The Quiet American", I've seen the movie but not read the book. My dad took me because he likes Michael Caine. But I've forgotten most of it, except being disturbed by some aspect of sex/romance in the movie. So, perhaps I should read it.