You sound worse than you were in high school, and even if you were "always like this", that doesn't mean you don't have depression. It may be recurring, you may not have perspective. (also if you're depressed you tend to not be able to imagine a different, non-depressed state of life)

Well, I wouldn't advise medication that's very strong. When I went on medication it was a child's dosage, for six months, and it really shouldn't have been enough to affect me - however, I coaxed myself to believe in its power, and I saw two really good therapists while I was on it (one paid for, only two sessions - she was magic, and she was in Lincoln. my doctor, whom I trust with my life, referred her. the other therapist was the free school therapist, was an intern, and was really good. when I saw her I was already on my way up and I told her the kind of therapy that i need to improve, and that's what she did, so she solidified the climb). Of course, we are different people with different situations. I just feel the need to inform you it can work. Do you have a good doctor in Lincoln?